On Appointing One’s Assembly

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Badasses Maintain Healthy Boundaries

Dare I say that all plants are potentially little Badasses?

“How could that be? I’ve killed every plant I’ve owned,” you say. “Not the other way around.”

Simple. You’ve killed them because you’re not a Badass. Not yet. Let me explain.

  • A badass individual does not kill plants because a Badass doesn’t take on more responsibility than a Badass can handle.
  • A Badass, then, will not commit to a relationship with another being (yes, plants are beings–they eat, breath, and require care to live) until that Badass understands, accepts, and agrees to the care and commitment the other requires.
    • Badasses know, honor, and respect their own personal limitations.

We’ll discuss limits and shit at a later time. Now, let’s talk about how badasses are like plants.

A plant knows it cannot grow and thrive for long when it shares space with weeds. Why? Weeds are selfish, narcissistic little bastards that have no care but to feed and nourish themselves, therefore taking the nourishment right from the good plant, eventually killing it.

“Fuck that shit,” says your mama’s geraniums. In unison.

Sound familiar? Sound like those dumb-ass-going-no-wheres you’ve been spending your precious time with? Remind you of that bitch-ass relative of yours who likes to degrade your every positive move and create constant chaos by causing disagreements, false scenarios, and emotional manipulations? How about those “friends” of yours who seem to have caught the crab mentality (“If i can’t have it, neither can you.”)?

Good. Admit that shit, wipe that tear away, and listen up, Superstar. It’s about to get real.

Weeds will always grow up and thrive around healthy plants, but if the healthy plant has a boundary around it, root deep, and is maintained on a regular basis, the weeds cannot progress to sucking the life out of the healthy plant. That’s badass.

“What does a plant, or weeds for that matter, have to do with me, punkass?” you ask.

Clearly you’ve not yet reached badass status. Badasses are patient, attentive listeners. Sit your no-attention-span-having ass down and take a deep breath. Exhale that shit slowly while you open that sweet-ass mind of yours.

Ready? Good.

My point: so can you, Sensei, create healthy boundaries around your sweet little innocent heart. Treat that shit like a prized garden. Weeds may pop up now and again, but if you treat your little “garden” with love and respect, tilling the soil, weeding it ever so diligently, fulfilling its needs–you’d better believe peace, beauty, and all that good shit under the sun will prevail.

Ever hear the saying, “You are only as good as the company you keep”?

Indeed, hero. Indeed.

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On Knowing One’s People

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A badass individual elects and appoints a worthy assembly as one’s badass company, choosing to congregate with those who share a similar high level of integrity, and excluding or expelling any and all individuals exhibiting disorderly, disrespectful, destructive and/or self-destructive behavior. Like a Badass motherfuckin’ tree. Or a healthy garden plant, perhaps.

. . . . .

Trees are Badasses

“A tree? A plant? WTF?” you ask.

That’s right. Nature’s trees are our steadfast teachers. Good thing for us, whether we reside in the city or countryside, they’re all around us. Why? Because nature itself is a true Badass that cannot be stopped. Wise up and observe, princess. Trees will push up through some thick ass concrete, grow through a chainlink fence, and “play dead” over a snowy winter only to yield delicious fruit for your hungry ass in the warmer months.

Those sweet-assed bastards.

Scarred, but showing no fear. Cast out and abandoned, but never hesitating to get its needs met by any means necessary. Chopped the fuck up, but never holding back from giving homes, shade, oxygen, and nourishment to those in need. Trees are no sheltered, selfish bastards. Hell, no. Trees are Badasses in the truest sense of the word.

These mighty warriors see that life’s elements and environments can be harsh, yet life’s outcome is always what you make of that shit. A tree needs sunshine to thrive, so that motherfucker will grow its way around any obstacle to get itself some sunshine. He doesn’t stay stuck in a situation that isn’t good for him simply because it’s comfortable and he’s used to it. A tree knows that if she’s not growing, she’s dying, so rather than wait for some asshole to *finally* adore her, she looks out for her own ass, getting what she needs before she can give, as should we.

A Badass is kind to one’s self, not afraid to out-grow and leave behind any environment that is not nourishing to one’s growth and well-being. Or else one is a stupid-ass.